All Posts for January 2010

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Full Course Divorce: Act Four: Scene One

Thursday, January 21st, 2010

Act Four

Full Set of Nails

Scene One

This scene takes place in the courtroom. It’s the last of Kate’s “trial by fire” as she negotiates for what she can get to survive as a single mother. Her lawyer’s name is Bill.

Note: Since this is Kate’s “trial by fire” courtroom scene, I downloaded “fire pictures.”


Kate

Bill, I don’t think I can take any more of this bullshit. Mitch is lying right and left. He is accusing me of adultery, when both of us agreed to an open marriage concept, which obviously did not work.

Bill

Look, Kate, your husband went bankrupt and you have lost everything. Let me at least get you some decent alimony and child support for you and Bekka until you get on your feet.

Kate

OK. But my heart is pounding and my stomach is churning and my head feels like a bowling bowl with two holes leaking all my common sense.

Bill

I promise it will only be a few minutes longer.

(Addresses the Court)

Your honor, my client will be leaving the area to look for a job in New York. She has custody of their daughter and will need to reestablish herself financially, so we ask the court to be generous with child support and alimony.

Mitch

(blurting out of order)

But, your honor, she ‘s an adulteress!

Judge

(addressing Mitch’s lawyer)

Your client is out of order. (Pause) I don’t know if this allegation is true, Mr. Mitchell. But since you are here for a no-fault divorce, this issue is irrelevant, Besides, even adulteresses have to eat!

Bill

Thank you, your honor. We realize that Mr. Mitchell is bankrupt, but Mrs. Mitchell was his partner for 15 years in the business, so his loss is hers as well. She has been out of her field for almost two decades and will have to start all over again. She plans to return to college for a master’s degree in journalism.

Judge

That’s very admirable, but in Mr. Mitchell’s financial situation, which I reviewed last night, he cannot be expected to pay for his wife’s education. His alimony and child support reflect his current situation and will be re-evaluated in six months.

To Mitch: Mr. Mitchell, I have reviewed you current job income and household expenses, based on the financial statement your lawyer submitted. I believe you have an obligation to your family and award your wife $150 week alimony and $75 week child support for the next six months. Then it will be reviewed.

Mitch

But, your honor….(His lawyer indicates him to be quiet with a shake of his head.)

Judge

Your first payment of $225 is due in 10 days, then each week thereafter on the first Monday of each week. Is that clear?

Mitch

Yes, your honor.

Judge

All the other terms we discussed will be spelled out in my report, which your lawyers will receive in 10 days to two weeks. Case dismissed.

After the court hearing, Kate goes limp and puts her head between her hands, face down, so she does not have to look at Mitch. Her lawyer pats her on the back and whispers something to her. She nods and he leaves. Kate takes out her cell phone and calls her sister.

Kate

Pat, it’s over. I was awarded $225 a week for the next 6 months; then a review. But the house, the business, and the furniture are gone with the bankruptcy.

Pat

Oh, I’m sorry, sis. But now you are free to move back to New York and go to school.

Kate

I didn’t tell the court I had already been accepted to journalism school and had a full scholarship based on my income.

Pat

Now you’re getting smart. The less Mitch knows, the better, because he will only use it against you later.

Kate

I can’t believe how vindictive he was! I never thought he would be so mean in court.

Pat

Fear will do that.

Kate

Fear of what? That I was going to get a lot of alimony? Or ask for my shares in the corporation? Like I told him when he gave me a million shares at $1.00 each while the business was going under: “Mitch, a million times zero is still zero.”

Pat

You’ve got that right. Now, how ‘bout if I treat you and Bekka for dinner? Joe is on a business trip and won’t be back until tomorrow.

Kate

That sounds great! You know Bekka loves Chinese food, so how about if we go to that new restaurant in town?

Pat

Gotcha! I’ll met you there a little before six and I’ll make a reservation. It’s a new restaurant so it’s likely to be busy. Everybody in town is trying it.

Kate

OK. See you later. Thanx, sis.

End of Scene One

End of Scene One, Act Four

Posted in Articles on Divorce/Marriage | No Comments »

Aging & Longevity: Part 2 – Healthy Eating & Exercise

Thursday, January 21st, 2010

Note #1: The pictures for today are from the Internet. I Googled pictures of eating and exercise and found pages and pages….

Note #2: My friend and neighbor Mim sent me an interesting article by Jane Brody, nutritionist who writes a column for The New York Times. Here are some tidbits from her January 11th column. When I use Brody’s own words, I put them in italics. My personal comments are in parentheses.


A healthy old age is a goal most of us would like to have. As Brody notes, however: There is no virtue in simply living long; the goal should be to live long and well.

While many Americans have improved their diets, based on the guidelines from the government and information from physicians as well as friends and family, we still have a long way to go. Brody states in her section,The Longevity Diet, that Americans are consuming less meat, saturated fat, and trans fats from processed foods, as well as increasing our intake of whole grains, fruits, and vegetables.

But, and this is a big but, we are a long way from consuming the kind of diet most closely linked to a low risk of heart disease, cancer, diabetes, stroke, and dementia. That diet need not be strictly vegetarian, but it should emphasize plant-based foods over the meat and other products that come from animals that eat plants. The closer to the earth we eat, the healthier and leaner we are likely to be.

Brody continues with a discussion touting whole foods over supplements that provide individual nutrients. For examples, she says that antioxidant supplements cannot protect us the way fresh fruits and vegetables can.Rather than isolated nutrients, combinations of them, along with other perhaps unidentified substances in foods, are now thought to confer the observed health benefits.

(Personally, I think most Americans already know this. Supplements are more like an insurance plan, since fresh fruits and vegetables, even organically grown, are not picked from the ground or trees and eaten right after they are picked unless you have a garden. Even then, then soil could be depleted of nutrients.)

Jane continues with a discussion about the now much touted Mediterranean, diet which seems to be linked to longevity, since it lowers the risk of heart disease, hypertension, and stroke, as well as breast cancer and Alzheimer’s. The Mediterranean diet consists of nutrient-rich vegetables and fruits, beans and grains, fish and shellfish, but relatively little meat and poultry. Olive oil is the primary fat for cooking and eating, even replacing butter as a smear on bread.

As Brody emphasizes, this diet is not in pill form, but rather the benefits are gained from eating real food. However, Brody does suggest calcium and vitamin D as supplements that are in “short supply.” Studies suggest that these supplements will protect our bones and possiblyimprove muscle strength, which helps to reduce the the risk of falls and fractures. She also notes that various studies suggest these supplements may also help prevent several common cancers, counter depression and enhance cognitive function.

(Before taking supplements, I would suggest that you check with your doctor to see if you have a deficiency of these nutrients. es)

While diet is important, Brody does write that regular physical exercise is important for staying healthy as we age. She also discusses that most people make excuses about why they can’t exercise. (Here I don’t agree with her because I think she puts a negative spin on exercise. Having been helped by my neighbor Mim, a personal trainer who sent me this article, we both agree that our attitude toward exercise need not be negative. Exercise isn’t punishment; it’s part of the joy of living. Here ’s where my theme of JOY fits in! I find that when I don’t exercise I feel cranky and lethargic. It’s not a chore, but a responsibility I have to my body, so I work it into my weekly activities.)


I do agree with Brody’s statement that:The single most effective activity, studies have found, is an aerobic activity like brisk walking about 30 minutes a day. If you cant get out of the house, walk inside. Go up and down stairs, walk the hall, walk from room to room, walk in place. If walking doesnt suit you, try dancing to music. The benefits of regular exercise cannot be overstated.

(What I have found is that my exercise doesn’t have to be so vigorous and rigorous that I am exhausted the rest of the day. Gentle Yoga, Golden Zumba, and other kinds of exercise geared to older bodies can be as beneficial, to me, al least, as running around a track until I can’t breath!)

The article ends with this simple quote and “command”: So get off the couch and make this year the year you discover the joys and benefits of movement.


(P.S. I would add: Also, get back in the kitchen and discover the joys and benefits of eating well! Maybe this year is a good year to take some cooking classes that reflect the Mediterranean diet. My recipes reflect this diet in that they are high in fruits, veggies, whole grains, beans, and olive oil. If you are new to this site, check out my recipes under Kitchen Nutrition with Recipes. Joyful eating and joyful moving!


Posted in Health Flashes & Reports | 7 Comments »

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