Love Stories of Later Life is about possibilities—the possibility of long-lasting love at a time when our life span has doubled; the possibility of keeping love and romance alive when married for decades; and the possibility of finding love again after divorce or widowhood. According to author and gerontologist Amanda Smith Barusch, exploring romance in the second half of life is a neglected research topic. Instead, most research is delegated heavily to love in our 20s and 30s, not our 50s, 70s, or even 90s.

But can love, romance, and passion flourish in the second half of our lives? Barusch answers with a resounding YES! And through her research she has demonstrated this to be true. That’s good news for all of us over 50, whatever our status. The author, with the help of her research team, has thoroughly research this field of late love. She tackles everything from ageism to sexual zest into your 80s and maybe beyond. After all, there is no limit on love!

What I especially like about the book is that the author has personalized it with her own concerns. At 50, she is beginning to notice changes in her own body and admits her own anxieties, which she shares with the reader. As a researcher invested in the information for personal and professional reasons, the author moves back and forth between being objective and subjective. Her own candor is refreshing.

Also, Barusch has planned the book well, dividing it into four parts: Love and Aging, Love’s Illusions, Lived Love, and Love’s Disillusions. It follows a natural progression, supported with statistics, age-appropriate black and white photos, and many pages of notes at the end to support her research. The author has definitely done her homework.
Equally candid are the comments made by the men and women she interviewed, which are scattered throughout the book. Because the responses are very candid, some are not easy to read, such as those in the chapter on betrayal and rejection.

“Old age is not for sissies” is a quote attributed to the movie star Bette Davis. Likewise, this book is not for sissies. It lays bare both the positive and negative aspects of romance among older men and women, including same sex relationships. The final paragraph in the text of the book bears reprinting, because it reflects the mostly positive tone of the research. So for those of you still seeking romance or seeking to rekindle romance in your marriage, don’t give up hope! Read this book for a realistic look at romance in later life. (And for a personal essay on my finding love later in life, go to This ‘n That and read “Second Time Around.”)

Romance blurs the boundary between fantasy and reality. Experiences structure our romantic imaginations, even as fantasies influence the way we perceive the world. Imagination is especially important in late life, when we are free of the pressures of preparing for the future and honed by decades of maturation. Like the proverbial child in the candy shop, we might bask in the delicious possibilities before us. Or we could meander along paths discovered long ago. Some of us may charge off to conquer new territories. Others might cower, afraid to break the rules or cause pain. Regardless of the experiences that await you, I hope your romantic imagination will be enriched and emboldened by heightened awareness of late life’s romantic possibilities. (p. 18)

Love Stories of Later Life is published by Oxford University Press, 2008. 240 pages. List price is $24.95.

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